An Uncommon Life is a collection of true-life accounts written by Bethany Kelly, the eldest daughter of Peter Amsterdam and Abi (formerly Damaris), recounting memories of her childhood and teenage years, including her interactions with Father David (Grandpa), Maria, and their immediate family.
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(From a second-generation member of the Family International)

My name is Esther Stevens, I am 31 and I was born in the Family. I am married and I have five children. Besides home-care and taking care of my children I work on a board that offers counsel to parents in the care of their children as well as organizing camps, activities and events for children.

I am very thankful to my Family up-bringing that enables me to perform the services I provide for others. I had a very happy childhood, my parents were excellent care-givers and loved us greatly as well as provided us with excellent training in reaching out to others less fortunate than ourselves. While we weren’t always affluent in a materialistic sense we never lacked for love and security, and in this we were a close family, amidst our “greater Family”. Even though now three out of the seven of us children (that is my brothers and sisters) have chosen different vocations other than Family missionary membership we still have very loving and caring relations even though we haven’t all pursued the same life-calling and vocations.
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Hi there, my name is Serghei Pînzaru and I’m 26 years old. I would like to share MY SIDE on the events of January 8th. First of all I’m deeply moved and saddened by Ricky’s murder of Angela. When I first heard about it I was shocked… Even though I never knew Ricky Rodriguez personally I know from the people who knew him that he was a very intelligent young man and that he was happy when he was in the Family International. What made him change??? Contact with antagonistic and hatred filled apostates who is sunk so low that they claim Karen Zerby was the one to blame for what has happened, incredible!!!

My sincere prayers are with the families of those who been involved. The scripture which comes to my mind is this: “Yea, and all that will live godly in Christ Jesus shall suffer persecution”. (2 Tim 3:12)

I’m a member of the Family International for the past 8 years, and previous to that I was a professional ballroom dancer in the Ukraine. What made me change my chosen career and join the Family International? It’s very simple, really, after I’ve met the Family I heard God’s call to: “Go ye into all the world, and preach the gospel to every creature”. (Mark 16:15) Jesus also sad:” If any man will come after Me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow Me. For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: but whosoever will lose his life for My sake, the same shall save it.” (Luk.9:32-24). This and other things moved me to give up my life of pleasure, riches, fame and comfort for going to those who needed help, encouragement and the love of Jesus. (more…)

Nora Mullen, 25, Africa
Second-generation member of the Family International

Words fail me when I try to describe my feelings about this whole tragedy and succeeding barrage of negative slander in the media. All I can say is please listen to those of us who are really here in the Family today and who have our heads screwed on straight—not some foul-mouthed, vindictive and violently-inclined group of bitter people. Is that too much to ask? I know that the media always tends to gleefully gobble up the dirty, dark, and juicy, and smear it in front of our faces, but don’t you ever wonder if there is another side to the story? Let me clue you in a little on my side of the story…

I was privileged to be born into the Family by wonderful parents who have loved, cared for and given me a WONDERFUL 25 years of life! I have lived in 9 countries spanning 5 continents and visited at least that many or more. I speak 3 languages, and feel I have received a well-rounded great education—and what’s better, I’m still learning all the time! I’ve lived in Africa for the past 5 years, including traveling all over the place and heading up daring missions into war-torn countries—and I love it!

I was never abused. I have never, ever seen any one abused in The Family. (more…)

Godfrey Thomson, 29, Mexico
(Second-generation member of the Family International)

I’ve really fed off of and have enjoyed reading what everyone has written here. It’s made me think back and reminisce on my childhood and life in general. It’s cool because every night my kids ask me to tell them stories about when I was a kid. It’s been so fun to remember! I hope I can give my kids the same upbringing and experiences I had.

When I think back on my childhood it brings a smile to my face. My life for the Lord in the Family has been amazing. There’s no way I can complain. I’ve lived in the most amazing places and houses and have done things that most people only dream about while they’re stuck at their nine to five dead-end jobs. All the cool people I was able to live with under the same roof. Learning from a wide variety of people with different backgrounds and experiences. Meeting all kinds of people, ranging from presidents of countries and famous celebrities to little fisherman on the Amazon river. I’ve had the privilege of being in recording studios from the age of eight. Singing and recording in several languages and so on. (more…)

From Joana Gonçalves, 25, Brazil.

I am appalled and saddened to hear (once again) allegations with no truthful foundation whatsoever, been stated against the Family International, accusing our group of being an unsafe and unsuitable place for children and young people to live and grow in, amongst other accusations. And as such, I would like to make my voice heard as one who has grown up in the Family and has experience a wonderful and privileged life with the many benefits of living in a group that’s sole purpose is to help its fellow man and to follow Jesus command to “Go into all the World and preach the Gospel to every creature” (Mark 16.15).

My name is Joana Gonçalves, I am 25 years old and Portuguese by birth. My parents joined the Family when I was a baby and since then have been part of the Family International working in Brazil and Portugal. Since I can remember my life has always been full of excitement and new experiences as we traveled to many different places telling people about God’s love and helping the lost and destitute. (more…)

My name is Knight. My parents are Arthur and Becky of ‘King Arthur’s nights’ notoriety. Born in London, UK, in 1975, I am one of many ‘fruits’ of the Family and our controversial FFing practice. I am 29 years old.

I’ve lived in 10 countries throughout my life, and traveled to over 40. I speak some Russian, Spanish, English and pieces of other languages. I have six brothers and sisters who have also been raised in the Family. My two brothers are no longer members of the Family, but have moved on and have found their niche in secular life. I love them dearly, respect their decisions and wish them luck. They are my brothers in flesh and spirit and always will be! My parents, sisters and I remain in the Family. Two are in India, one is in the US and one in the Middle East. They are angels and saints working, living and toiling in their lives for the Lord on the mission field. Some have families of their own. I have the utmost respect and admiration for them.

My parents raised our gang on the road, after living and working closely with Dad and Maria for a couple years in the 70s. During and after the RNR, they served the Family in a ‘Visiting Shepherd’ capacity. During that time we traveled Europe for approximately three years, and then transferred to Peru for two years or so. We moved again to India where I lived for six years, then to Argentina for three years. I then moved to the US for three years, Russia for about one year and have been working behind the scenes since 1997. I’m currently working in an administrational Home as a Handyman. I have an awesome girlfriend. I couldn’t be happier or more fulfilled.

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By Benjamin Van Nynatten –Rio, Brazil

This will be brief, I promise. I wouldn’t subject anyone to my writing if there was any other way around it, but extreme circumstances require extreme measures so please bear with me, just a little, while I attempt to express my thoughts on this issue.

I will not try to impress you with my style or choice of words, as that would just not be possible even if I sat here all night. Actually, the reason I am writing this is because after reading over the many postings on this site, I can’t wait to get my name on the list as well. If someone is throwing mud at you, well, I want some thrown at me too! If we’re being slandered and lied about, they can’t forget me! And I heard something about a tidal wave that’s coming for us, well hey, I brought my swim trunks just in case. Whatever it is, I’m having a part in it! I’m here to stand by each of you to the end, I’m proud to be counted in the company of the elite.

My name is Benjamin Van Nynatten, and I am 29 years old. I guess this means I was raised at about exactly the same time and, I suppose, in similar surroundings and the environment some claim was abusive and detrimental. It’s been said a thousand times and I want it on my record that personally I was never abused or mistreated in any way during all my years in the Family– my whole life, really. Not only that, but I can say with conviction that I never saw anyone else suffer any sort of maltreatment in all the communities I’ve lived in. (more…)

Written by Ariana Matas – a second generation member of “The Family International”

My initial reaction when hearing of the tragic event of the murder of Angela Smith by the hand of Ricky Rodriguez was complete shock and sadness. I wasn’t so shocked however when I heard the blatant lies spread through the media by our detractors. Nor was I shocked when the media just gobbled it up like my goldfish gobble the fish food I throw at them – although comparing the media to my gentle goldfish would be an illusion. I would compare the sensationalistic media of today to voracious sharks who often don’t care who they rip apart as long as they get their fill of “high-rated”, lucrative stories.

I AM shocked though at the unashamed disregard for human life displayed by our detractors and I hope and pray that somehow the general public will comprehend and wake up to the following analysis: If Ricky Rodriguez was capable of brutally stabbing and killing an innocent victim, if others in the circle of our detractors are capable of speaking of physical violence against the members of our missionary community and treat this tragedy with the coldness and hard-heartedness of what you would expect of a serial killer then what sort of a conscience would keep them from blatantly lying and making up false accusations against our community? Think about that next time you’re sitting in front of the T.V. and some sensationalist program comes on spraying the typical but oh so juicy “cult stories”. Think about that next time you pick up the New York Times with the title “Murder and Suicide Reviving Claims of Child Abuse in Cult” (Ooooh, there goes the “cult” word again. How’s that for an eye-catcher?).

Look, the truth is a very different story. I have authority to say this statement on what is the truth because I was also born and raised in “The Family International”. As far as I know the reporter Laurie Goodstein, who wrote the above-mentioned article in the NYT, never visited or lived in any of our communities. I challenge her, along with her distinguished journalist colleagues, to not only interview the “more than a dozen people who grew up in the cult” (Boy, do you guys just love that word….) who speak of the supposedly “horrible treatment” received while in our community but to interview at least a fraction of the several hundred young people who are happy, fulfilled and presently living in our missionary communities. I challenge you to not only cite the abuse stories fed to you by our detractors, but to cite, even if only some of the abundant real life stories of young people presently living in “The Family” who are giving their lives to somehow change for the better their part of the world. Do you dare do that? Or are those true-life stories not qualified as “eye-catching”, “attention-getter” or “lucrative” for the general public? God help the media of today for perverting the appetite of the general public creating an inordinate desire to hear and read lurid, scandalous stories with little, if any, basis on facts and the way things really are.
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My name is Gisela Leda Barbosa (Gigi), I am 32 years old. I know the Family for 8 years. I am in the Family for 5 years of my life – which are truly the best ones ever! I am Brazilian. I am very happy that the Family is preaching the gospel in every continent – that’s why I was reached at the first place. The Family is fully obeying Jesus’ commandment to go into all the World and preach the gospel to every creature. (more…)

(From a second-generation member of the Family International)

My name is Katrina Dove, daughter of Paul & Terry Theophilus. I am 36 years old & have been in the Family International since the age of 6. I consider my self a child of the Family; in fact I often say I grew up with the Family. I am the proud mother of 8 children & have been a Family teacher since the age of 21 & before that for three years an assistant teacher. I have taught Family kids in Japan, Brazil, the USA, East Europe & more… I can also cook, sew, organize children’s show troupes, & have a few other talents for which I give the fact that I grew up in the Family credit, including the gift of being able to adapt to many different types of cultures.

I feel the need to contribute to the voices that I’m sure will speak up for the Family, Mama, Peter, & all we hold dear. (I started to write this before the new site www.myconclutions.com was set up, & now I am proud to say that there are many).
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To all Family members, former members favorable or otherwise, and curious third parties,

My name is Justin Adair. I’m 28 years old and was born and raised in the Family. I have lived in Australian, India, Japan, the USA, Mexico, and now Chile, working as a missionary and in Family administration. I have a few things I would like to say regarding the recent the sad events concerning Rickey Rodriguez and Angela Smith. Since this tragedy occurred there has been talk from our detractors that the Family is and always has been an “abusive environment” and that those in the second and now third generations of the Family have been and will continue to be abused if the Family is allowed to exist.

This is ludicrous.
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Hi! I’m Angela. To start with, I guess I have a little different story; I joined The Family just over 10 years ago when I was 19 years old. I had a 9 month old little boy when I joined. All things considered, there’s no telling how our lives would be now had I not made that decision. Believe it or not, Daniel Roselle was the first person in the Family that I met and what an impression he had on me, he was roughly my age so I could relate. I was intrigued with this “happiness” that this group of Christians possessed.

Before that first meeting I had been in a relationship with my now husband who had grown up in the Family but was out at the time…when he told me that he wanted to rejoin, me just a few months pregnant, I was shocked none-the-less. (more…)

(From a second-generation member of the Family International)

A few words of introduction: I’m 35 years old and have been in the Family since the age of three when my parents joined the Children of God. I’ve lived through pretty much every part of the Children of God/The Family International’s history, and lived in Homes on almost every continent.

I’ve been saddened and appalled by the recent events involving the brutal murder of Angela Smith by Ricky Rodriguez, but I’m even more appalled by the rewriting of history that is being perpetrated both by Ricky before his death, and bitter former members who are using this tragedy as a platform for avowed goal of harming and destroying the Family. As someone who for years lived with both Ricky and Angela, I can’t just stand by and watch the news media make a mockery of the memory of such a saint as Angela was by the twisting of the truth, whether intentionally, or unwittingly playing into the hands of those intent on causing us harm to justify their own choices in life.
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By Regi Roselle, 28, second-generation member of the Family International.

A year and a half ago I sent my immediate family an email announcing the birth of our second daughter, and a photo. Most responded with the usual congratulations and well wishes. My brother’s reply however, read:

Regina,
You work for Zerby, a mentally damaged and damaging woman. I don’t consider you my sister. With future births, please leave me off your emailing list.

Daniel

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It wasn’t always like this. Daniel and I were born 18 months apart and spent much of our lives as each others’ shadow–like most siblings I suppose. I looked up to him as my smart big brother with incredible imagination. He was always doing something creative: exploring, dressing up as famous characters, or building something. He seemed to make friends so easily. I wanted so much to be like him. (more…)

By Leila E., 28 years old, second-generation member of the Family International.

I think every parent, when they have their first child, looks back on the way they were raised, and they make decisions regarding how they will apply what they’ve gone through in their own life to how they will raise their child. You look at the happy times, the fun times, you look at the experiences you remember as pleasant, even the things that weren’t so fun, but were necessary in making you who you are today, and you want to bring those things to life in your own child. You also look at the things that hurt you, things you disliked and you swear you’ll never let those things happen to your child.

In the Family today, I would venture to say that close to 80% of the children are third generation children. They are our children, those of us who were raised in the Family, and who were the “victims” of a lot of what the Family has been accused of for the last 20 or 30 years. What I’d like to know is why our detractors are still harping on the same issues, when we’ve all grown up. We’re adults now, and so, no, we don’t need to be rescued. We have children now, and we intend on raising those children as best as we possibly can. (more…)

My name is Anne Boleijn, and I’m a second generation member of the Family. I’ve lived in the Family all 30 years of my life.

I look back on my life and I have so many wonderful memories, and am grateful to my parents for raising me in the Family. I have traveled to close to 30 countries on 4 continents, I have learned 5 languages, I have met countless people and experienced life and the world in a way not many others my age have been able to—except others who grew up in the Family, of course. We have such a rich heritage, one that I am proud to be a part of.

It’s not that in all this time I have never questioned whether the Family was the place for me—I have, and sometimes still do. But that questioning doesn’t come from any fault of the Family, or any fear that I or my daughter are in any danger. It comes simply from a desire to try something different, to see how I would fare in society, to see how successful I would be, and to live for myself and make money. The bottom line, however, after giving these things much thought is that I couldn’t stand a life like that. I have grown so accustomed to a life lived for others, a life that gives and keeps giving, that I am pretty certain I would be miserable if my life was only about me. I would be bored and unchallenged, my life would have no meaning. I have also felt that by leaving the Family I would be depriving my daughter of the best environment for raising children that you could hope to find. So I’m still here, I’m still challenged, and still living a life that I believe with all my heart has more meaning than I could find anywhere else in the world.
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By Rima Parker
Age: 26
Country: Nigeria

I can’t get over the fact that there are people out there who are wasting their lives living in the past and holding on to so many grudges and ‘injustices’. Can they really be happy wallowing in their memories – or selective memories dare I say – of a life which to them is past? Are they not capable of moving on and letting bygones be bygones?

I work as a member of the Family International in Nigeria, West Africa, where we facilitate and manage free health care programs that bring free medical attention and life-altering surgery to thousands of rural dwellers and set up vocational training courses and schools for the handicapped, orphans, the underprivileged and many others. (more…)

I don’t know who may be reading this but whoever you are, if you love freedom, if you love liberty then may I please suggest that you stop to take the time to read this and ponder it.

On the night of January 8th a horrific and tragic event took place in Tucson, Arizona in which a lovely and innocent woman was brutally murdered and then her murderer sadly took his own life. In most cases this sort of homicide/ suicide wouldn’t generate that much media coverage, at least not internationally.

However, unfortunately in this case it has, as those involved were former members of the Family International. Ricky Rodriguez was the murderer and Angela Smith was the victim who suffered a cruel and untimely death. When I first heard the news I was greatly saddened and appalled that such a thing could have happened as in our fellowship we are diametrically opposed to any and all forms of violence of any sort.
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By Christy G.

I am a 29-year-old second generation member of the Family International. I was born in Switzerland and raised in the Family International. I have been on five of the seven continents, and have had a full and happy life thus far. While my life hasn’t been perfect (whose is?), it has been blessed in countless ways. I am grateful to my parents for the heritage of faith that they gave me.

In the Family International I am surrounded by friends and co-workers who I know love me and I can count on to be there for me. I live in an atmosphere of love, trust, respect, and camaraderie, and we have a common goal—that of bringing God’s love and light to this darkening world. I have the deepest respect and admiration for each of the members of our organization, who lay down their lives daily to give to others, and to help make the world a better place. I have seen them in action, and have been part of the action, in Africa, Asia, and South America.
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From Nic (26)

I would like to take some time here to express my thoughts and opinions on the recent happenings following the tragic event that has occurred. I would like to address this specifically to those who are inclined to only believe or listen to the handful of negative former members and apostates (I say “handful” because ‘believe it or not’ there is a much larger group of former members who have truly moved on with their lives and who lead productive lives in society to whom I would like to sincerely and highly commend! All I can say to those is God bless you, we are truly praying for you!) who so openly spout off their pontificated and embellished accusations regarding their; and thus mine as well, supposed “evil, perverted, and abusive upbringing”. Then they go so far as to attribute the recent acts of hatred and violence to the Family and the way we were raised.

In saying the above I am not in any way trying to imply that the Family is perfect but I do invite any of you who are to go ahead and “cast the first stone”. The Family is made up of people who are after all “only human” but their biggest desire is to give their all to the Lord and to love and serve Him, as well as love and serve others to the best of their abilities in hopes of making the world around us a better place. Does that sound so weird or perverted to you? (more…)

By: Elizabeth Amber M., 26, Chile
(Second-generation member of the Family International)

How can one defend a pre-meditated murder done in cold-blood? How can one slander a murder victim? How can someone who knows nothing about a situation write or speak about it without having done any research? How can someone who has never met me say they know how I feel or how my life is? What happened to freedom of speech where both sides of a story were printed and people were given a chance to choose what to believe instead of being told, where stories were based on evidence, not hearsay or rumor? How can a country that fought for religious freedom so easily deny that right to their own people? It’s beyond me.

I was born and raised in this amazing organization. I couldn’t have asked for a more exciting lifestyle than the one I received growing up traveling all over Europe, North, Central and South America. I have met and talked with people from over 100 countries. Listening to the types of lives they’ve lived has only convinced me further that I am living and working in the best group on Earth. I’ve had the opportunity to learn about so many things that many my age have never, and probably never will. I’m a well adjusted, secure, self-confident, independent individual and, thanks to the Family, I have a very wonderful, fulfilling and satisfying ministry and lifestyle that lets me explore and try out new things and opportunities. I have always felt loved by those I’ve lived with and have felt their care and concern daily in all that they’ve done to take care of me and make sure I had all I needed physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually. What more could one ask for? (more…)