Mike Moore
So. California, USA

I am a 29-year old second-generation member of The Family International. A program director for missionary outreach, I live in Southern California with my wife and three children. I was shocked and saddened to hear news of the brutal murder of Angela Smith and the subsequent suicide of her killer, Richard Rodriguez.

What happened was horrific. I know Angela very well. She was a beautiful person; gentle, caring, funny and young at heart. She didn’t deserve this. After the initial shock and anger I now feel a great sadness for the loss not only to her family, but to all of her friends and the many of us who knew and loved her. She will be missed.

It saddens me greatly to see Angela’s character being besmirched and her death being exploited by a small group of former Family members whose stated goal is to destroy me, my friends, my lifestyle, my beliefs and my family. Their defense and rationalization of this brutal attack is appalling. They are not representative of the majority of former members that I personally know and I appeal to my personal friends and family that have made a successful transition to a secular lifestyle to speak up in defense of us who still care for you and wish you well.

Let me say a few words about allegations of child abuse, since this is not only the supposed justification for Richard’s actions, but is now being used by those with the stated agenda of destroying our religion as the reason for their attacks. If there was a chance in hell that my three wonderful children would be harmed, neglected or abused by anyone in The Family, I would not hesitate for a moment to discontinue my association with and involvement in The Family. If anyone laid a finger on one of my children to abuse or mistreat them, I’d have the cops on their back faster than you can say “911.” Anybody who knows me will attest to this and anybody who says otherwise doesn’t have a clue.

I want what every parent wants for their child: a safe environment to learn and grow in, a top-notch education and their physical and emotional needs met. This is what my children receive each day in my home and this is what the children I have seen in other Family communities receive as well.

What about this alleged abuse then? I can only speak for myself and the people I have known personally over the past 29 years. I had a happy and safe childhood growing up in Family missionary communities in South America and Asia. I was never abused. I never saw abuse. Those who say it was rampant exaggerate for their own ends and to justify the extreme actions they take.

I do know that some abuse occurred over 20 years ago, as the world was emerging from the sexual upheaval of the 70’s and learning that clear boundaries need to be in place. Family parents were upset and Family leadership acted decisively. It was not hidden, glossed over or denied, as it was with some other organizations or churches. It was addressed head-on and clearly denounced. Effective safeguards and procedures were put in place to prevent it from happening again and to excommunicate anyone who would do such a thing. Any material previously published by The Family that could possibly contribute towards such abuse was thoroughly eliminated.

I am truly sorry for those who genuinely were hurt. I can only imagine the pain they could have felt and if this was the case with Richard Rodriguez, then I feel for him too. I wish he could have received the proper help to overcome his hurt and have a successful life.

Sadly, abuse occurs in all levels of society. Nations with a superior infrastructure, such as the US or Western Europe, have been able to reduce it only to some degree. I think it is a remarkable achievement that The Family, with communities in nearly 100 countries and with members of over 90 different cultures, has been able to eradicate it. This is a fact, roundly proven by the testing of over 700 children from Family communities 10 years ago. I wish that all of society could say that their actions and results had been as effective.

I categorically reject the accusations of those who take something that happened 20+ years ago and say that an “abusive environment” exists today. Nothing could be further from the truth and I suspect they know that.

To my friends and fellow-missionaries I say, take heart. God has promised that “All things work together for good, to those that love Him.” That doesn’t mean this is a good thing, but in his amazing way, He will bring good out of it. I hope that on our part, we won’t let the pain and anger we feel at someone who would do such a thing prevent us from forgiving. Forgiving him and forgiving those who “know not what they do,” but have been caught up in a whirlwind of their own pain and anger. I hope we will continue to reach out and find common ground, as Angela was trying to do.

To those whose beliefs are different than my own, but who just want to live their life the way they want, I wish you the best. Family community life and missionary service is not a vocation for everyone and I am happy for those who make a firm decision on what to do with their life, even if that direction is not the one my life is taking, so long as it is generally respectful of life, themselves and others. Reasonable minds can disagree and debate religion and social issues with mutual respect. I only ask you not to get caught up in the hate speech of those who want to whip up a bonfire of bitterness and anger. No good can come from this. Only sorrow. If you still believe in God, I pray you will have a close relationship with Him and that you’ll be at peace in your heart and life.

To those who, upon choosing another path for their life, then make it their life’s work to destroy mine, if you still have a conscience, I appeal to you to tone down the rhetoric. There are many reasons for this tragedy, but don’t think that you can speak inflammatory words of violence and that they will have no effect. Don’t think they didn’t have an impact in this case or that you somehow weren’t indirectly responsible for this. My children are happy, well educated, safe and well adjusted. Your words and actions are causing them a fear and pain they’ve never known and are putting them at risk to insults, discrimination, and true hurt. I still extend a hand, if you’re willing to put down the knife.

God help us all!

Mike Moore is a second generation member of the Family International.