My name is Joy Yonan-Renold, 20 years old, born and raised in the Family International.

With such a statement, it would seem many people would immediately feel pity, disgust, fear or the like. I mean, wasn’t I raised in an abusive and unhealthy environment? Hasn’t my brain been bombarded by lies, manipulation and coercion, and is therefore barely functional? Aren’t I trapped inescapably in a “cult” that enslaves my will through religious indoctrination?

I say: THERE ISNT ANYTHING FURTHER FROM THE TRUTH! Not only am I a free-thinking individual, but, I also voluntarily decided to COME BACK and REJOIN the Family, after an absence of five years! And, I have a daughter, whose welfare means more to me than anything. I daresay as a mother, I would not willingly subject my child to any abusive environment. But here I am, smack-dab in the middle of one of today’s most controversial religious groups; a group that is regularly accused of child-abuse, brainwashing, etc.

I am here to refute that.

There is nowhere I would rather have my daughter grow up, than in the Family. As an example, I will use my own childhood, to which I credit my intelligence, social skills, sense of purpose, physical and mental health, and success in life.

I was born in Hong-Kong, 3/10/84. When I was almost 3, my mother and I moved to Bangkok, Thailand, to one of the Family’s large schools at that time. For the next 9 years of my life, I was given an excellent education and ample opportunity to develop creatively, physically, and mentally.

For instance; because of the Family’s belief in early learning for children, I read comprehensively (encyclopedia level) at the age of 5. I also knew numerous facts, particularly about the history and culture of Thailand. I skipped kindergarten and never did first grade, when I started “traditional school” at the age of 6. I also, (along with my peers) scored above average in our yearly diagnostic tests. At the age of 9, my reading and language skills were that of an average 14 yr old. My class (of 7 or 8 of us of the same age) was regularly called upon to demonstrate what we were learning for visitors and other Family teachers, as an example of Family education.

I remember my early learning years to be full of variety. Aside from our regular studies I learned: traditional Thai dance, history and culture, sewing, cooking, playing the recorder (wasn’t too enthusiastic about that one), singing (including recording music), performing, art, drama, gardening and music appreciation. In fact, nearly everything was in some way made into a learning experience. We had regular excursions, vacations, outings, and chances to interact with other children in society. I was never lonely (I was a single child for 11 years), neglected or ostracized. My mother wasn’t the only one concerned for my welfare. Everyone was. Because, in the Family, we are expected to treat every child as if they were our own. Where else in the world can you find that mentality?

My teachers? I still rave about them. Marie, Heidi, Serena, John D, Luke, Isaac and others, were attentive, loving, and played a major role in making me the woman I am today.

One particularly significant part of my childhood was performing. We had a dance group and performed numerous times over the years for under-privileged children, orphanages, hospitals, homes for the elderly, benefit functions, dignitaries, national holidays, on TV, for members of the Thai royal family, etc. I still have a love of dancing now, but the best thing I remember from those experiences, was the emphasis placed on making others happy. That was the goal, to do something to help others come to know love, and through that love, Jesus. I learned to witness about my faith to others, but was also taught to respect the religions and mores of any country I resided in. Besides Thailand, I have also lived and experienced 8 other countries in three continents. I spoke, read and wrote Thai, as a child (though I don’t anymore), and I speak and read pretty good Spanish.

Not only was I raised in a loving and educational environment, but a Christian one as well. As missionary children we were taught the Bible and Christian morals everyday. My feet were lovingly placed on the path to righteousness. A firm faith in Jesus was instilled in me, and remains unshaken today. Though I’ve gone off on my own, and questioned my beliefs at times, the foundation remains. Because of the Family, and Jesus, I am today, fulfilled and happy in life.

“Now”, you wonder, ”if she had such a great childhood, why’d she leave?” Well, we all know a great childhood doesn’t mean you don’t make your own choices in life. I am not, nor will ever be, a perfect human being. I have my faults, as much as anyone. And, I went through a difficult set of teen years. I rebelled (what adolescent doesn’t at some point?) and wanted to try something else outside of missionary life. Was I held back, preached at, and made to feel eternally guilty? I was underage (14), so my parents had full right to demand I stay with them. But no, my mom, sensing my unhappiness and frustration, asked my aunt if I could live with her temporarily. Over the next few years, (1998-2002) I attended a couple of high-schools (St. Josephs and Downey High-school, in Los Angeles, CA), and eventually went back to live with my mother who settled in Panama. This was in my sophomore year (Oxford International High-school, Panama City), and I was intent on finishing high-school and not really thinking about the Family much. I spent the next 3 ½ years in Panama, attending high-school, and did well academically and socially. Being a teenager, I also tried to find fulfillment in typical teenage activities, drinking, partying, smoking weed, etc. I also had a boyfriend and unintentionally got pregnant in the middle of my senior year and moved to Los Angeles to finish my senior year. During this time I not only did well in school, but also excelled. I was the top student in most of my classes with a 4.0 GPA, and received regular praise from my teachers for my work ethic, responsibility and intelligence. I scored in the top 7% and 12% of all students in the State of California, on the Government/Civics and Economics GSE tests, respectively. Guess who I gave the credit to, or rather what? YES! My missionary upbringing! I wrote several essays for high-school and later college giving praise to my diverse missionary childhood for making me the intelligent, well-rounded individual many say that I am.

With my high-school years closing and after a little college I was forced to look at my options and evaluate which road I wanted my life to take. I had potential to “make something of myself” in the world. Would I choose a life of self-servitude, a quest for wealth, and the pursuit of pleasure or one of self-sacrifice, a life lived for others, and eternal fulfillment and purpose? I chose the latter. Jesus himself said, “For what would it profit a man if he gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?”

All this, is not to advertise myself or my abilities, but rather to shed light on the fact that “a tree is known by its fruit”. The Family is the tree, and I am the fruit. I know what I am, and I know what I want my daughter to become. Nowhere can I find such high quality of life as in the Family. I have chosen to make my profession that of a disciple of Jesus. The Family is where I can serve him to the best of my ability. I am a professional.

If someone doesn’t choose this life, and its sacrifices, joys and rewards in turn, they have NO EXCUSE to try to malign me and the people I love, for our choice. Frankly, I can’t intelligently understand or give a damn about the small-minded, bitter (and most likely miserable) people who live to degrade, lie, and accuse the Family, meanwhile upholding the excuse that “us poor young people need to be rescued” (a.k.a our apostates. I don’t have anything against the former family members that have chosen a different life and leave us in peace, to them I say thank you!). I tell them GO TO HELL! I’m where I want to be, and you have no right to infringe on my chosen lifestyle with your horrible, twisted and downright untruthful accusations. Just cause you couldn’t make it as a professional disciple, just because you are now one of the unenlightened millions, just because you are no longer privy to the living word of God and the promises of a future in the life to come, just because you think you have a right to be bitter, doesn’t justify you NOT GETTING A LIFE AND MOVING ON! Stop poisoning others with your verbal waste! Stop blaming the Family for your failures as an individual!

Jesus told us “If ye were of the world, the world would love its own, but because ye are not of the world, therefore the world hateth you.” Right there is the excuse for their hate. WE ARE NOT LIKE THEM! We will not be conformed, and we wish to have no fellowship with their “unfruitful works of darkness”. Its sad that’s the only way our apostates can “feel special”, the only way they can get attention. I pity them. No matter how many times us young people in the Family speak out, they’re determined “not to be confused with the facts”.

Jesus said, “Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness sakes, for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven”. I’m glad I’m the blessed one. You choose who you will believe. But I am going somewhere, I am making a difference with my life. What are you doing?