(From a second-generation member of the Family International)

Hi! My name is Zeph Fischer. I’m 31 years old and I’ve spent all of those 31 years in the Family. I married at 20, and my wife and I now have 5 beautiful children, and we live in sunny Mexico. I’ve lived in over 10 different countries and feel that I’ve experienced a great big bite of life!

As a kid I performed on TV and radio, released a hit album, traveled the globe and experienced a thrilling and different childhood.

At age 12, I became interested in moving away from my parents and trying things out on my own, so I asked my Dad if I could move to the Philippines where there was a program for young people my age and within a couple of months I was there.

Moving away from my parents at this age really helped me grow up fast and learn some big life lessons on responsibility and accountability.

Some people would argue that by moving away at that age, I lost my childhood, but I would say that life only became more exciting and the experiences I had more intense. I learned to be more responsible for my actions and interacting with my peers, who are also from all different backgrounds, which helped me develop good people handling skills.

Another huge difference in my education in the Family compared to that of a secular education is that I constantly had practical, hands-on training in areas I was interested in, like carpentry, computers, electronics, and of course—my first love—music!

At 14, I moved to Japan with my mother and my step dad. He was a foreman for some major building projects. He pulled me into working with him and I learned a great deal, not only about the practical side of building, but also about teamwork and administrative/ management skills.

Today I am an administrator for our projects here in Mexico—which entails youth counseling, food and clothing distribution projects, outreach, fundraising—and everyday I pull on the experiences and training I received growing up in the Family.

It would be naïve to say the Family never made any mistakes as “errare humanum es”* (*see your Latin dictionary). Bad things happen to everybody. Nobody has a “perfect” life. It’s about learning to take the bad things and using them as stepping stones, learning from them and not getting bitter and resentful.

For the record, I have been in many of the “training centers” and programs that so many people have complained about, and I can honestly say that though they may have been tough, it was nothing compared to places like West Point, or the youth detention centers I have been involved with helping. At least for the most part, we had people who were concerned about us and had our best interests at heart.

About my children—I know that in the Family they are getting a well-rounded upbringing, a chance to meet and interact with people from all walks of life, learning to put others’ needs above their own which builds character. By saying this I am not saying they’re pushovers, as they are very strong spirited with lots of personality, and they never cease to amaze me with the neat things they say and do.

Many of my peers are no longer in the Family and are doing well, but as we can see from recent events that when you allow bitterness into your life and feed it with others’ bitterness that you’ve adopted, it can only end up eating you alive, and in the end destroy you, and sadly in this case Angela as well. She was such a kind and caring person, and so full of life that it is unimaginable the hate Ricky must have had in his heart to do something so unthinkable. My kids loved her, and she was a joy to be around, and a constant source of energy. We cried when we heard the news.

I’m a couple years older then Ricky, and I lived with him for a short while in Japan. We became friends and he would confide in me. From my time talking to him it was very clear that he was very impressionable, and if I told him anything he would have believed me just because we were friends. Being the follower type that he was, and considering the crowd he chose to hang out with, I can’t help but wonder if something happening like this was inevitable, as when you constantly fill yourself with hate and bitterness it’s bound to manifest itself eventually. I think that those that were cheering him on and feeding his hatred with their own exaggerated bitternesses should take some responsibility in the ghastly crime he committed.

Another thing I don’t really understand is how he goes on about being dealt such a bad hand in his life, as he was given so many opportunities to be able to excel in any field he wanted to. I guess the grass is always greener on the other side, and you don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone.

I believe that life is what you make of it. God has given each of us so much to work with, and if we can just see the great potential each of us have, we with God’s help, will be able to conquer any difficulties we’ve had in our past. Look at what Helen Keller had, but with persistence she became a great person, and the list is endless of people who overcame despite not being dealt the best hand. I feel that some people have used their past as an excuse for not grabbing life by the horns and making something of themselves.

Another reason some people who have left the group rag on the Family is because deep down they feel that maybe they made the wrong decision, and they have doubts, and by bashing the Family they are justifying themselves and the decision they made to leave.

Everyone is not cut out for this type of life, and I definitely don’t look down on those that choose another way. I still have friends that have left and we are still close, but the ones that are doing the best, in my opinion, are the ones that take on things with a positive attitude, look life straight in the eye and don’t make excuses for anything.

Sincerely,
Zeph Fischer

Zeph Fischer is a second generation member of the Family International.