“What use are we to society and mankind?”—A big question that stimulates us into action during our years of adolescence on up. “What is the purpose for our existence on earth?” As young people we search for a solidified and self-assuring stance and posture in life. We desire to feel assured and confident in the walk of life we commit ourselves to. And if we have searched hard but have not found the deal of appeal, then often in our lack of experience and exploration we flourish in frustration unnecessarily—if you can understand what I desire to express.

I am a second-generation young person at this present time. Yet despite the fact that I had been born and raised in the Family, there had come a certain period in time that I, too, had to find God. I grew up in the nurture and admonition of the Family doctrine, yet it was mainly only in mind until I came to a crossroads where I had to decide–Not because I was coerced or threatened by a physical entity–By all means, no. By being in the Family, I cannot deny that I was tremendously privileged to partake of the incomparable blessings I had at my fingertips, of which I would barter nothing for.

At 12-15 years of age, with a toss and a turn of my head to the side and to the left, I pondered for a moment. My peers in the quarters around me expressed innumerable doubts and fears that coincided with mine. I needed a breather so bad that I ventured into my own world of things to think deeply about the meaning of life and the true content of the whole picture that began to paste itself before me.

It’s an undeniable test of life, that each of us, whether in the Family or without, must fight to preserve our lives and find the genuine and lasting peace that the world’s billions in existence are searching for. And for those who have left the Family – dare I say, most often prematurely, without having given God a fair chance – if they haven’t found the true and lasting peace out there, it drags me by the hair to know that they seek to get us out and destroy the foundation that “I,” for one, have found immense and irreplaceable fulfillment and satisfaction in. And one would think that I’m either forking up some crooked and phony lie, or that I’m some old fogy with little or no experience. I’m 18 years old, buddy, and an attack on the Family is an attack on me.

I would not that I come across self-righteous or heartless, yet, neither do I desire for my perspective to be affected or tarnished due to my fervor and emotions toward humanity. I believe that we are all equal – whether in the Family or not. And I love humanity even at its worst. But why must we fight each other? We all know that the basis of our Family belief – which all our rules and regulations are fastened to – is to love. So I question the reason and purpose of those who really know the Family doctrine, yet who despise it and fight to undermine it. I understand that in the carnal mind there are many that may have legitimate questions, but I seriously wonder as an 18 year old “young person,” where they go to for their answers.

There is a phrase that is widely used outside of the Family circle, “I will live my life the way that I want to & the way that I think is best, so you should do the same… and don’t bother me with the facts.” I personally would not want to use this phrase, because I do not believe that it is how things should be. Yet, despite how I would not, there are many others (that is, out of the Family) that would. And this shows the frigid and callous attitude of this present world and the state that it has fallen in to. Those who have left the Family and have experienced life in the open world would know this prevalent and scattered attitude. But where do they base their cause or reason to attack the Family way? Is it in love or hate? If they say their reason is established on love and concern for their brothers and sisters who yet remain in the Family, then I just can’t be at peace lest I reach the conclusion that they must be very deluded! It’s extravagant to claim their love and concern in the actions that they have taken, which I have no doubt but to say is for the purpose of “tearing us out,” rather than “giving us choice.” For the sake of the universe and the law that even Lucifer is bound by, I wonder why they don’t simply leave the choices up to us—plain and simple. I don’t find pleasure when they butt their noses into my business. We all have choice, yet it is their bitterness and resentment that causes them to attack our beliefs, and I take it as a personal attack. Well, even that is a choice… But has that become their career? Is it now their life’s ambition and aim to sacrifice and invest their precious time and bodies toward the destruction of the Family? For the sake of their afterlife, “the Family” has given them choice, and I question why they wouldn’t do the same for us. I do not believe in dictatorship and coercion. Yet, if I am not in accordance with what they say, and if there are others of like mind, I do not agree that they would have the right to attack us like they will if cases are so. Talk about coercion and threatening!

I would like to share my mind in summary with those who have spent faithful years in the Family, yet who have left the Family and now attack my belief (that is, the Family’s belief): “Evaluate and recognize your position in life—If seemingly meaningless and unfulfilling, acknowledge that you might be looking in the wrong place. If confused and in need of answers, pack your bags and come see the Family. In the Bible it talks about the great falling away. Time is short, but God is not limited. His hand is not shortened that he cannot save, neither is his ear deafened that he cannot hear. I love you guys…”

Yushi Shimonaka (18) is a second-generation member of the Family International.