My name is Daniel Yoder. I am 22 years old and have spent every one of those years in some level of membership in The Family International. I’ve been to 22 countries as a missionary, assisted in countless humanitarian aid projects, and four months ago I got married to my girlfriend of three and a half years.

There’s a lot I could say in response to all the recent accusations and slander that has been so prolifically written and played in the media over the past couple weeks. Although let’s face it, the media gives the people what they want, and they want sex, they want cult members, they want salacious allegations of abuse. Let’s face it; it’s exciting, it’s better than a Hollywood script. So why bother and pay the writers when you can find it for free, in the mouths of a small group of vocal and antagonistic ex-members of a group called the Family. Who wants the truth anyway? The truth is boring, the truth doesn’t sell. Who wants to watch a show that gives a fair and objective viewpoint from the other side? Fair and objective aren’t exciting, they are boring, and we all know what boring doesn’t do (if you forgot see above).

Here’s an idea though. Let’s stop, consider the facts, and see if we can’t bore ourselves for at least a little while. That is until the next big story hits. I can only speak for myself so in my own words here is my response.

Allegation # 1: The Family is an unsafe place to raise children, due to the widespread child abuse present in Family homes.

Personal Response: I was born in the Family and have therefore lived as a child in countless Family homes during those years. Never to my recollection have I been the victim of abuse nor seen a child being abused.

Allegation # 2: Young people who have left the Family are never fully able to adjust to society. Their lives are ruined due to their isolation, abuse and lack of education in the Family.

Personal Response: I can only answer for myself and make observations based on seeing my friends who have left the Family and chosen to pursue other walks of life. On all counts those people have gone on to excel at either their job or university. How is it, I wonder, that these “isolated, abused, and undereducated” young people go on to be the top of their class or receive promotions over their “socially involved, well adjusted, scholastically informed” peers? Yet again I can only speak for myself, but in my humble opinion it’s because the young people in the Family have access to an unparalleled education, the kind you can only receive in a socially involving, well adjusted environment.

Allegation # 3: Young people who are in or have left the Family are “dropping like flies” committing suicide en masse because they aren’t able to deal with life after years of abuse.

Personal Response: I don’t know anyone personally who has committed suicide except for one man I knew from work, who had never been a part of the Family. There are currently 1,800 people over 18 who were born in the Family and remain in the Family today. Strange it seems that at least one of my friends would have joined the legion of others who are “dropping like flies” (according to an ex-member oft quoted by the media) all over the world. Maybe I’m just deluding myself and I should wake up and take a look around me. Then I would see what they’re talking about. Better yet I should check my own wrists to make sure I haven’t been subconsciously trying to end my own life. How about not, instead why don’t we examine the facts…according to the Family International, In the History of the group, seven members or ex-members have committed suicide. According to the vocal ex-members the number is more like thirty. In the thirty-seven years since the beginning of the Family that comes out to, let’s be fair and put it somewhere in the middle, how about seventeen? In 2002 alone 31,655 people ended their own lives in the United States. Who do we blame those deaths on? We can’t pin them all on a new religious movement but I guess we’ll work with what we have. So let’s call seventeen in thirty-seven years (since the founding of the Family in 1968) “dropping like flies”. You can’t argue with that statistic.

Well I could respond to all the other accusations but my fingers are sore already. Maybe I’ll write some more on it another time. Until then, here’s to Boredom.

Daniel Yoder is a second-generation member of The Family International