I am compelled to share my thoughts in light of the recent events. I don’t know if I have anything to say that hasn’t already been said by a fellow Family member, but I will write this anyway. If no one reads it, it has been a load off my mind. I would like to cite a disclaimer here: When I refer to “apostates” or “detractors", I don’t mean the former member assembly as a WHOLE. I love you all.

My name is Florence McNair, I’m 15, turning 16 in September. My parents are both loving, talented people who raised 8 wonderful children, who I am privileged to call my brothers and sisters. I’m having a great time growing up. I see myself as one of the fortunate few who are able to enjoy life as it is happening around them. I’ve been acquiring many useful skills. I sing and write, among other things, and have put a few of my budding abilities to work doing various things like layout, childcare, songwriting, etc. I know that people will tell me I’m at an impressionable stage in my life, and that everything I feel strongly about is just a reflection of the opinions of those around me. Of course this is true to some extent. Sure.

But I know that my parents and people in my home see this loss of life as a terrible tragedy. I know that they are praying, as I hope we all are, for the situation. I know that we would all like to have nothing but fond memories for the people whose lives have ended. I can also see, without having to be told, that there may be much more to these events than funerals and eulogies for lost loved-ones. I know that there are people who see the cause and effect differently than I do. I know and have lived with some of these people. I love them with all of my heart. I have three older siblings who have chosen to leave the family, and I see them occasionally and communicate with them via e-mail and over the phone. I love them and I’m always excited to see them and visit with them.

I don’t know how to address our differences, so I don’t. Sometimes I forget that they live differently than me-that they have chosen a different lifestyle.
I was shocked when I heard the news about Ricky. Immediately I knew that damage would be done to relations between Family members and former Family members. I knew that people would come to different conclusions about how and why things happened. I was quite afraid that this would expand the barrier between me and the people I love and respect who have chosen a different life outside the Family. And I couldn’t believe how some former members immediately concluded that everything happened as a result of a traumatizing life in the Family.

I really don’t understand all the psychological machinery behind the thoughts and intents of these irate detractors. I cannot begin to comprehend why these people, who were my fellow brothers and sisters, could leave a life of fulfillment and love and become embittered to the point that they seek to do us physical harm.
This is my testament to fact: I am not traumatized. My childhood was happy, and I have piles of photographs documenting it from its beginning 15 years ago to the present day.

I was born in Japan, and have spent thirteen happy years in my current residence. I have plenty of friends, I have access to scores of books and educational material, and enjoy reading and learning. I especially enjoy meeting new people and conversing with them, and ultimately sharing my belief in God with them. I am ever so blessed to know the truth; there is nothing that excites me more than sharing the truth with others. This is my way of establishing my individuality. I’m different, I’m happy, I’m having fun, and I have a purpose in life; a purpose that I’m willing to give my life for. My choice is to serve the Lord in the most effective way I see possible. I’ve made the choice to remain in the Family because this is where I know I’ll be able to achieve the greatest success.

But, if there is anyone who would seek to jeopardize my work for the Lord by slandering the group that I love and serve, my brothers and sisters, then I am forced to get just a little angry.

Even if you are no longer doing what you were doing before; if you are no longer a part of our dream to change the world, you can’t deny that we make a difference. You can deny your entire upraising in the Family, and the good you did. But remember the look on that child’s face after he’s been given aid, comfort, hope, and love.that is something you can’t deny. Even if you are no longer making a difference with us, why try to stop us?

What you don’t realize (and if you do.I don’t know what to say to you) is that by hurting us, you are hurting more than just the Family, you are hurting the countless millions whose lives are touched by our work; by the work you used to do with us. You are not putting an end to vice, you are putting an end to love. You can’t deny the love. I’m sure if you were quite honest with yourself, you would admit that most of your life in the Family was happy; you were a fortunate and talented individual, until you left and let yourself listen to lies and distorted truths. You believed someone else’s story. You adhered to someone else’s opinion. You became someone else.

And now that you’ve left, what are you doing to better the world?

Florence McNair is a second-generation member of The Family International