(From a second-generation member of the Family International)

My name is Katrina Dove, daughter of Paul & Terry Theophilus. I am 36 years old & have been in the Family International since the age of 6. I consider my self a child of the Family; in fact I often say I grew up with the Family. I am the proud mother of 8 children & have been a Family teacher since the age of 21 & before that for three years an assistant teacher. I have taught Family kids in Japan, Brazil, the USA, East Europe & more… I can also cook, sew, organize children’s show troupes, & have a few other talents for which I give the fact that I grew up in the Family credit, including the gift of being able to adapt to many different types of cultures.

I feel the need to contribute to the voices that I’m sure will speak up for the Family, Mama, Peter, & all we hold dear. (I started to write this before the new site www.myconclutions.com was set up, & now I am proud to say that there are many).

First I want to say that I so admire Mama for her courage to follow her convictions & obey no mater what has happen to her personally. It’s hard to even put into words how sad I feel about the death of two of our former members. Not because death is sad in itself but because of how they died. One brutally murdered & the other committing suicide. For the 30 years I have been in the Family both as a child & a mother/teacher I never thought that someone who was my peer could actually murder another human being much less someone he grew up with. I even had a hard time really believing it actually happened, even though I know what bitterness is & what it does to you. I can say from experience that the only people bitterness hurts are yourself & those you love most. I suffered with it for years, & as time went on my bitterness grew till I nearly was eaten up. At one point when I shared my feelings with some one I trusted, about the turmoil that was going on inside of me, I was only given love & acceptance & some very good council that pulled me through & probably saved my life. I finally was able to forsake my grudges when I saw what a hypocrite I was in pointing the finger at others.

Oh yes, one other thing, I just don’t comprehend the “free thinkers” mentality. From the contact I’ve had with so called “free thinkers” both in the Family & those who never met the Family I get this ironic disparage from them about how I should think the way they believe is ‘free & open mindedness’. It really irks me that some one can claim to be free when in fact they are very bound in trying to be “just right” in their freedom & then turn around & accuse others of not following the “right” way.

Any time I have considered the idea of leaving the Family because I wanted to live alone or open a business etc… I come back to the reality, that the care & protection my children have & the fact that I don’t have to worry about them going through all kinds of things without me even knowing about it & growing up in insecurity not having any real purpose in life, helps me to keep going. I am not what I call a “flag waving Family member” or what others might call biased towards the Family. I realize there are things we can improve, but whenever I talk to people outside of our communities I can’t help but walk away with a feeling that I & my children are blessed. For example all the “non-member” female friends I made in Brazil had gone through a very tough life, either with their husband or brother having major trouble with alcoholism. There was one 52 year old woman who was our Land Lady, she had been regularly beaten by her husband when he got drunk from the time she was 17. He never bought even one piece of furniture for her or the 4 children they had together as he spent every bit of money he made drinking on the weekend. She was a smart & ambitious lady who by the time I met her owned 7 houses & was having the 8th built. Hearing about the tough life she & other women I got to know had, gave me a lot of reasons to be thankful. So I am convinced that the Family is the best place for me. Even if it is not perfect in some peoples eyes, it is perfect for me, & the best place I can imagine to raise my children.

So for any one who has read this, I pray that my little voice will help you see things from the “God factor” view point. If you can’t see God’s hand in your life you just won’t make it, or at least you will lose much of the point in living life. Like the quote from one of David Brant Berg’s writings, “When we know that God loves we know that every thing is going to be ok”.

Katrina Dove is a second-generation member of the Family International.