I´m not known for my many words or eloquent speeches, therefore my purpose here is one-fold: To make my presence known to all those out there that I´m am here to stay, come rain come shine, whether encouraged or not by my former friends or personal family. By the Grace of God & His continual never-ending mercies, His Will be done!

I am determined, with all my heart & soul, to win this world for the Lord & raise my kids in the best way I possibly can—the way my parents raised me! And I know I will make mistakes & be less than perfect in this almost impossible mission, so I will not judge less I be judged!

I love all you out there, FGA´s, SGA´s, & all the “A´s”. Keep up the fight! It´s only begun! You can count me in!

- Amêndoa Hopper

I’m not a very good writer and in another situation I’d probably decide to not write anything, but in light of the recent happenings and the things that have been said I came to the conclusion that if our apostates have a right to express their opinion and give us a piece of their mind then I should too.

I was born and raised in The Family International and, once of age, out of my own choice, decided to continue as a missionary and raise my family in it too. I have four kids, all of which are smart, outgoing, sociable kids. All their lives I’ve done my best to raise them in a loving atmosphere, where they get their needs met and are free from abuse. Let me tell you one thing, if I had any suspicion of abuse to either them or any other child in the Family I’d be out of here in a flash.

Why do I stick around? Besides for the fact that I love what I do, and I love the Lord with all my heart and all my other personal decisions, it’s because I know that the Family is the safest place for any child to grow up in. You might say I’m naïve, or that I say this because I know no other life style but the truth is all you need to do is look at the news today. When I was a teenager I visited various detention homes for kids, orphanages and government institutions for kids whose parents had abused, beaten or abandoned. Now that was heartbreaking. The stories some of them had to tell were horrifying, extremely sad and definitely not the kind of stories you hear about in the Family. Of course, you might say that all this is normal in those kinds of places, but what do you say about the poor kids in kindergarten schools who get pumped with tranquilizers (a.k.a. DRUGS) just because they are a bit on the hyperactive side. If you look around society today there are a number of other instances of real physical, emotional and psychological abuse.

Now let’s be honest, we all know that there were mistakes made, even abuses from certain individuals but from what I’ve heard and seen, those people have been excommunicated from our fellowship. Leadership has apologized for the mistakes on their end in not making things very clear from the beginning and has taken the necessary measures to ensure that things like that will not happen again. For me that’s good enough. I realize that each one of us who have been wronged in any way have to make a choice of what we are going to do with it. Some choose to move on with their lives, putting the past in the past, and making the most of their present and future, while yet others choose to dwell on the negative (which undoubtedly eats you up from the inside and eventually gets exaggerated) and most of the time their lives stay that way in everything they do, stuck in the past. Pretty pathetic if you ask me.

I have a number of friends who have left the Family, most of which have gone on with their lives. It’s interesting to see how those who became “losers” in a way, after leaving the Family, ended up blaming their parents and The Family’s upbringing for their own lacks, when the truth is, while in the Family, they were lazy, hated studying (and did everything in their power to miss out on scholastics), murmured about having to do a job here or there. Basically they were losers in the Family. Then they left the Family to pursue other ideals but hey they wake up to the crude reality that “nothing is for free” and you have to work hard out there. (I know, I worked for about a year and let me tell you, it wasn’t easy getting up at 4:45 am every day to get home at around 8 pm only to find my, at the time, 3 kids awake waiting for some mommy time.) Yet those who worked hard and made the best out of their time in the Family, when they left to pursue their goals with all the training and wonderful upbringing they had, they really did move on, got a job and are attaining the goals they had.

When one of my friends left the Family, I was one of the first to know, he came to talk to me about it. Honestly I really admired him for making the decision to leave. Why? Because being in the Family is not for everyone, but a lot of people just sit around complaining about the things they don’t like and they don’t leave because they know that if they did leave it would be a lot harder to have the commodities we have living communally. I mean really, when you have a number of people working toward paying the rent, taking care of your kids, cleaning the house, etc… and all you have to worry about is doing your ministry, it’s a lot easier than having to worry about all of that and more on your own.

Anyway, back to my story. I told him I really respected his decision to leave the Family and that I would like to continue being his friend but he would have to respect my decision to stay. He did and we continue to have very good communication. I love him a lot and he’s like a brother to me. Once he asked me “Do you consider that you’ve been brainwashed? Because sometimes I think young people in the Family stay because of that, besides the fact that they know no other life style, and you’re afraid of not ‘making it’” Honestly I never considered myself a brainwashed, senseless robot, following through on everything I’ve been told.

To be really honest, being in the Family, as I see it, is something directly linked to faith. Here’s how I look at it: Whenever a new revelation comes out, or some new direction for the Family, each one of us is faced with the question, “Do I believe this? Do I have the faith to accept this? Or does my faith go no further?” The day I don’t fully agree with some doctrine of the Family, or I don’t accept it in my heart, I’m not going to kid myself thinking I should continue on as a Family disciple. I will remove myself to suit the membership where the level of my faith is at. And if I ever decide the Family is not the place for me to be in, I’ll go and truly move on with my life.

I’m in the Family because I believe with all my heart that this is the right place for me. Each of the Family’s doctrines has become a personal belief, it doesn’t matter to me what others think about it, I have faith in them. It is because I believe the Word that I’m still here.

I totally respect those of you who have chosen other lifestyles, I know The Family is not the place for everyone, and hey we’re not attacking you for wanting to pursue other goals in life, why are you attacking us? Let us live our lives while you live yours. And if you’re intent on living in the past remorsing over some abuse and dwelling on how it affected you negatively, go right ahead. But don’t make it your goal to ruin other’s lives too because of it. Did it ever occur to you that perhaps not everyone “suffered” like you, and we did live in peaceful havens all our lives?

I’m ever grateful to my parents for raising me in the Family. I know perhaps for a few years they weren’t with me as much as they would have like to be, because of their job at the time. But I always felt loved. I had an excellent education, thanks to my parents who were always concerned about this. I wish other kids in the World today would be able to feel the love and care I got from my parents, the time they spent with me. As busy as they were every night we’d spend time together as a family talking about the day’s events and reading Bible stories together. Of course I went through my rebellious teen years and I’m sure some of the things I said to them hurt them but they took it all in stride praying and knowing someday I’d come around. I wouldn’t trade my upbringing for anything. Now I have my own family and I pray they can one day turn around and say the same about me and their heritage.

Some of our apostates say they want to “save” us from our past, or save our kids now from suffering what they did. (You guys sound like you want to do humanitarian aid. Why don’t you go rescue the poor guys in Iraq who are suffering needlessly, on both sides? They are the ones who are truly psychologically, emotionally and physically abused.) But let me tell you something, I’m old enough to know what I want and need in life. I’m happy, fulfilled and I see that my kids are being raised in the best way possible. What is there to save us from? Leave us be. Find some other cause to dedicate your time and energy to; there are a million other cases where you could really make a difference if you really want to, and are fighting for the right cause.

I’ve been an active member of the Family for almost 3 years and fellowship with the Family Home in my city, where I participate in the Word classes and social events. Whenever we can, my girlfriend and I go to the Home for fellowship with our brothers and sisters.

I was told of the very sad situation that happened in January and I was very shocked, especially after hearing that so many lies were coming from former members of the second generation.

Since I’ve met the children and young people in the Family I’ve realized how special they are and what a wonderful upbringing they’ve had. The teaching that the parents in the Homes give to their children should serve as an example to any family in the world. It’s ridiculous to imply, much less accuse the Family of subjecting their children to any type of abuse.

The children in the Family are taught to think and they have the right to choose what to do, contrary to the way children in the world are taught, where the educational system manipulates the kids since a very early age.

I believe the Family is no doubt the church that is best prepared to face the Endtime and to serve the Lord during this period. For me, there’s nothing like the Family, because I’ve never felt so loved and respected in my whole life.

A few individuals have turned their vehicles toward some goal they believe will bring them satisfaction. But rather than taking the recommended route, they’ve decided to take a shortcut through a certain residential area. They also believe that the laws of the road don’t apply to them any more, and have decided they shouldn’t have to pay heed to speed limits, stoplights, or yield signs.

This residential area is teeming with children. There are babies and toddlers, young carefree kids, and trendy teenagers. Their parents are walking with them, holding the babies, leading the kids by the hand, shadowed by their teens. They’ve always expected to be safe where they live. They have a right to be safe.

But someone has decided that, so long as the destination is “justice,” anyone who happens to be “in the way” must be volunteering for the profession of road kill. Others have even decided to treat this reckless driving like a sport, to publicize and–unbelievably–to justify the personal road-rage-style sentiments as certain people careen recklessly through what was once a quiet neighborhood. The safety of others doesn’t seem to matter any more, because “somewhere back there” in another time and place, an injustice occurred.

Where are the traffic police in this scenario? They must be on lunch break. Reckless endangerment is a specific traffic offense in some parts of the world–you don’t even have to hit anyone to qualify for a fine.

I Googled up the term “reckless endangerment” and found the following definition on a website called “Washington State Legislature”:

Reckless endangerment.
(1) A person is guilty of reckless endangerment when he or she recklessly engages in conduct not amounting to drive-by shooting but that creates a substantial risk of death or serious physical injury to another person.

(2) Reckless endangerment is a gross misdemeanor.

Granted, I’m speaking figuratively. It’s a word picture to describe how I see the latest horrendous allegations of a few, that seem intended not to seek legitimate amends for past wrongs, but to hurt many.

On About.com, the US military goes a little further in their definition of the term “reckless”:

(3) Recklessness. “Reckless” conduct is conduct that exhibits a culpable disregard of foreseeable consequences to others from the act or omission involved. The accused need not intentionally cause a resulting harm or know that his conduct is substantially certain to cause that result. The ultimate question is whether, under all the circumstances, the accused’s conduct was of that heedless nature that made it actually or imminently dangerous to the rights or safety of others.

So to you who are endangering the rights and safety of my baby, my small nieces and nephews, and the children of my friends and peers in the Family, I say, please park your car. Two wrongs don’t make a right. Nobody says you can’t seek justice if you truly qualify–taking the proper and established routes to do so–but nothing justifies the road rage a few of you are displaying and the reckless endangerment you’re causing to innocent and defenseless children.

Oh, did I say defenseless? Because I just remembered there is allusion to a standing fine for the kind of driving you’re doing–traffic police or no–so I’ll leave you with a reminder of what it is, and a hint that for the safety of yourself and all those around you, you might want to park your car and take the bus.

But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea.–Jesus
(Matthew 18:6, KJV)

How can one defend a pre-meditated murder done in cold-blood? How can one slander a murder victim? How can someone who knows nothing about a situation write or speak about it without having done any research? How can someone who has never met me say they know how I feel or how my life is? What happened to freedom of speech where both sides of a story were printed and people were given a chance to choose what to believe instead of being told, where stories were based on evidence, not hearsay or rumor? How can a country that fought for religious freedom so easily deny that right to their own people? It’s beyond me.

I was born and raised in this amazing organization. I couldn’t have asked for a more exciting lifestyle than the one I received growing up traveling all over Europe, North, Central and South America. I have met and talked with people from over 100 countries. Listening to the types of lives they’ve lived has only convinced me further that I am living and working in the best group on Earth. I’ve had the opportunity to learn about so many things that many my age have never, and probably never will. I’m a well adjusted, secure, self-confident, independent individual and, thanks to the Family, I have a very wonderful, fulfilling and satisfying ministry and lifestyle that lets me explore and try out new things and opportunities. I have always felt loved by those I’ve lived with and have felt their care and concern daily in all that they’ve done to take care of me and make sure I had all I needed physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually. What more could one ask for?

I have weak health but never once suffered from a lack of medical attention and care. My teachers, care-takers and parents (my amazingly, awesome and loving parents) made us kids their life’s priority and saw to it that we were well educated, clothed, happy, healthy and had our every need met. I WAS NEVER DENIED AN ADEQUATE EDUCATION! They worked hard to plan fun things and special places for us to go, and it wasn’t until I was older that I realized that much of what we did when we were kids, most kids never experience. VIOLENCE OF ANY KIND WAS NEVER TAUGHT OR CONDONED! We have much better lives than kids out in the world because we have people who love and look out for us wherever we go and aren’t taking care of us because it’s a job they get paid for. They do it because they love us and have a vision for why they are teaching us.

I love this group and will defend it with my life and gladly die for it. It’s the best place anyone could grow up in and I wouldn’t trade the life I’ve had (with all its ups and downs) for any other lifestyle. I don’t deny that there were those who were wronged by certain individuals within our group, but the amount is small and those mistakes were rectified, sincere apologies given and rules put in place to assure that it never happened again. Now it’s up to those who were wronged to accept those apologies and move on with their lives. It’s time to forgive and forget and get on with life! I know because that’s what I’ve done.

You see, I was one of those children who was sexually abused as a child by a member of our group. Not by my parents but by someone living with us whom we trusted. For around a year he abused that trust and me, a child just turned 8. For years the memories replayed themselves in my mind. I couldn’t act normal or feel comfortable around older men. As a child I didn’t know what to do but cry silently. It was a living nightmare for me and it left me traumatized for a time. “Why did it happen to me?” was a question that played itself over and over again in my head. I had every reason to be angry about it happening to me.

But the thing is, I am no longer affected by it. I got over it and learned how to leave it in the past, live life and not let it affect me. And you know what? It was my parents, shepherds and the Family that helped me make it through the whole ordeal. It was their love, understanding, prayer and care that helped me get over it. They were the ones who taught me how to get past that stage of my life and taught me the magic of forgiveness. It wasn’t some ’shrink’ who has no idea who I am or what I’ve been through.–Who doesn’t love or care about me but who is only in it for the money.

One thing I have very clear in my mind is that this was not the fault of the Family but of an individual and since I was a child I didn’t think of reporting it for fear of what he would do to me. But believe me, once my parents found out, they took immediate action to rectify the situation and removed all of us from his care and moved away. This person is no longer in the Family and if he ever tried to re-enter he would find it very hard since we have very strict rules regarding people rejoining who were known to be abusers. WE DO NOT TOLERATE ANYONE HARMING OUR CHILDREN IN ANY WAY, SHAPE OR FORM! I have also received a personal apology from Family leadership for not having stricter guidelines placed earlier in order to protect me and others from situations like this.

People make mistakes and, yeah, situations did get pretty nasty before at times. But it’s not the situation that makes the person but what you do about it that does. I am now a better and stronger person and can help others who’ve been through similar events. I know that there is a way to conquer those memories and painful feelings, and I know the Answer Man (Jesus) personally. He gave me that inner strength to fight and the love to forgive and forget. He also gave me the best parents, siblings, shepherds, friends and companions in the world to work and live with and I am so thankful for them all.

We’ve gone to every degree possible to assure that it never happens again. As you can see from all the other testimonials, I am only one in hundreds of kids born and raised in the Family who have experienced something like this as opposed to the many in society at large. May God help those of you who haven’t yet learned this. We aren’t child abusers, nor are we brainwashed, mindless zombies. I am here because I want to be and no one can change that. We are whole-hearted missionaries trying to help our fellow man and raise our children in the nurture and admonition of Christ. There’s a world out there to save and we’re wasting what precious time exists by being dragged down into a war over allegations that have already been proven false. Why not help us instead? You’ll find it’s much more satisfying than what you’re doing now and you just might get hooked. Give it a try and let us do our job!