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	<title>My Conclusion &#187;                     Speaking Out</title>
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	<link>http://www.myconclusion.com</link>
	<description>All things The Family International.</description>
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		<title>Free Hugs to Advertise Jesus</title>
		<link>http://www.myconclusion.com/free-hugs-to-advertise-jesus</link>
		<comments>http://www.myconclusion.com/free-hugs-to-advertise-jesus#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 15 Dec 2008 21:51:54 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dan</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[                    Speaking Out]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[               Featured Posts]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[     Europe]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Archived]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.myconclusion.com/archives/2008/12/15/free-hugs-to-advertise-jesus/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[By Nala (General member), Iceland
 We marched up and down Laugavegur (the main shopping street of Reykjavík) with signs proclaiming &#8220;Free Hugs&#8221;! I don&#8217;t even know how many people we hugged that day. I&#8217;m sure I personally hugged over 100! People&#8217;s reactions were very positive.
  &#8220;This is just what I needed! You just saved [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><em>By Nala (General member), Iceland</em><br />
 We marched up and down Laugavegur (the main shopping street of Reykjavík) with signs proclaiming &#8220;Free Hugs&#8221;! I don&#8217;t even know how many people we hugged that day. I&#8217;m sure I personally hugged over 100! People&#8217;s reactions were very positive.<br />
  &#8220;This is just what I needed! You just saved my day!&#8221;<br />
  &#8220;We need more people like you guys!&#8221;<br />
  &#8220;Thank you. That&#8217;s so nice!&#8221;<br />
  Some people even stopped their cars and ran out to get a hug! Workers in a downtown bar came rushing out all at once to share the love and get a hug. To those who asked what we were advertising and how much it cost, we gladly answered, &#8220;We&#8217;re not advertising anything but love! And it&#8217;s free!&#8221; We made sure to advertise Jesus, the King of love, though, and distributed tracts to all we met. With free hugs and a loving message, we did our best to make our part of the world a better place, to brighten the day of strangers, and maybe save a life.</p>
<p>Here is another post with a video-slideshow from a similar event held in Argentina!<br />
<a href="http://www.myconclusion.com/archives/2008/12/15/spring-day/">Here</a></p>
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		<title>Angie Staughton&#8217;s Response to the Larry King segment on The Family International.</title>
		<link>http://www.myconclusion.com/angie-staughtons-response-to-the-larry-king-segment-on-the-family-international</link>
		<comments>http://www.myconclusion.com/angie-staughtons-response-to-the-larry-king-segment-on-the-family-international#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 06 Aug 2008 03:40:10 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dan</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[                    Speaking Out]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Archived]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.myconclusion.com/archives/2008/08/05/angie-staughtons-response-to-the-larry-king-segment-on-the-family-international/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[As a 30 year old second generation member of The Family I find the story aired on The Larry King Live Show to be very one-sided and tainted. The people in The Family International are dedicated to making the world a better place and to see them cast in such a negative light breaks my [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>As a 30 year old second generation member of The Family I find the story aired on The Larry King Live Show to be very one-sided and tainted. The people in The Family International are dedicated to making the world a better place and to see them cast in such a negative light breaks my heart.</p>
<p>Many people within The Family are people I know and love, who sacrifice selfish pursuits in order to reach the world with the love of Jesus. In countries all around the world, The Family is often one of the first to respond to times of crisis, such as natural disasters, and the effect they have in relation to the finances and personnel available is unparalleled. Instead of balancing out this show by focusing on all the good that the Family has done and continues to do, the show instead focused on a small part of The Family&#8217;s past that has been drastically changed, apologized for and addressed repeatedly by The Family&#8217;s leadership.</p>
<p>I have always believed The Larry King show to be pretty fair and unbiased, but after watching last night&#8217;s show my opinion has changed considerably. The Family has been analyzed by a number of academics and leading professionals, as well as courts all over the world, and in almost every case it&#8217;s been the opinion that The Family is a save environment  for children and no signs of abuse were present with any of the children examined. You would think that a show that is focusing on child abuse within The Family would think to mention that, especially since it&#8217;s easily available information.<br />
<span id="more-584"></span></p>
<p>I also don&#8217;t understand why out of all the academics and sociologists that have studied The Family, this show chose to feature Steven Kent, a person with obvious bias and a vendetta against The Family. It seemed like the deck was stacked against The Family in this show from the start and I can hardly call it journalism.</p>
<p>I take exception to the claim made over and over on the show that second generation members who leave have no skills and have great difficulty integrating into society. I left The Family for a time when I was 21. I had no problem getting a job, going to college, making friends and starting a new life. My parents were always supportive and in truth, the skills gained during my time in The Family were what helped me be successful in my endeavors outside the Family.</p>
<p>I could go on and on about the lies and distortions featured on this show, and I will give the benefit of the doubt that Larry King himself was misinformed, as I have a hard time believing a serious journalist could allow such an unbalanced show to air unless he was. I am a proud member of The Family and will continue to be. I stand beside my beliefs and am so grateful for the wonderful childhood I enjoyed that was rich in faith and love. May all the children of the world be so lucky.</p>
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		<title>In response to CNN’s “Young man&#8217;s suicide blamed on mother&#8217;s cult By Randi Kaye CNN” (airing December 4th on CNN)</title>
		<link>http://www.myconclusion.com/in-response-to-cnns-young-mans-suicide-blamed-on-mothers-cult-by-randi-kaye-cnn-airing-december-4th-on-cnn</link>
		<comments>http://www.myconclusion.com/in-response-to-cnns-young-mans-suicide-blamed-on-mothers-cult-by-randi-kaye-cnn-airing-december-4th-on-cnn#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 04 Dec 2007 23:10:20 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dan</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[                    Speaking Out]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Archived]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.myconclusion.com/archives/2007/12/04/in-response-to-cnns-young-mans-suicide-blamed-on-mothers-cult-by-randi-kaye-cnn-airing-december-4th-on-cnn/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[From Claire Borowik for the Family International
December 4, 2007
Contact:  Claire Borowik, Public Affairs Desk for The Family International, publicaffairs@thefamily.org
It is disappointing that a reputable network such as CNN would publish such sensationalistic, poorly researched material. The  bias and lack of balance displayed in this program transcript are highly unprofessional and discriminatory. Although I [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>From Claire Borowik for the Family International<br />
December 4, 2007</p>
<p>Contact:  Claire Borowik, Public Affairs Desk for <a href="http://www.thefamily.org/">The Family International</a>, publicaffairs@thefamily.org</p>
<p>It is disappointing that a reputable network such as CNN would publish such sensationalistic, poorly researched material. The  bias and lack of balance displayed in this program transcript are highly unprofessional and discriminatory. Although I was unable to participate in their program due to the fact that I was overseas at the time, contrary to what was published, I provided statements and other materials for their program.<br />
<span id="more-582"></span><br />
It is clear that the intent of this program was to discredit <a href="http://www.thefamily.org/en/about/structure-and-governance/">Karen Zerby</a>, current co-administrative and spiritual overseer of The Family International.  <a href="http://www.rickyrodriguez.org/">Ricky Rodriguez</a> never accused his mother of abusive actions whether in his video, or in his multitudinous internet rants, and the tale told by alleged “witnesses,” specifically Davida Kelley, is absolutely false. Ricky did not “escape” from the group as this program alleges, but rather joined the 32,000 people that have voluntarily exited our movement over the past 30 years. His mother was supportive of his decision and assisted him financially for several years after his departure to establish himself.  </p>
<p>Court findings paint a very different picture of <a href="http://www.thefamily.org/en/about/structure-and-governance/">Karen Zerby</a> and the efforts she has made to ensure the safety and well-being of Family members, both young and old. Justice Ward made note of this role in his custody ruling: “I am now totally satisfied that The Family, I would think largely at Maria&#8217;s prompting, has since 1986 made determined and sustained efforts to stamp out child sexual abuse and to prevent any inappropriate contact between adults and children whether young children or teenage children.  I have no evidence that child sex abuse is presently prevalent any more within The Family than outside it.” (Family Division, Case W 42 1992, London, England, October 19, 1995). </p>
<p><a href="http://www.thefamily.org/">The Family International&#8217;s</a> success in protecting our children and enforcing our zero tolerance policy for the protection of minors has been documented by court-appointed and independent investigations in the early ‘90s of almost 700 children living in Family communities. After extensive physical, psychological and educational testing, all of the children were found to be healthy with no sign of abuse in a single case. This total absence of abuse speaks for the efforts made to safeguard children in Family communities. I question whether random investigations would produce similar results in society at large.  Not according to the Department of Health and Human Services, that reports a rate of at least 13 cases of abuse per 1,000 in the United States, with British authorities reporting close to 200 cases per 1,000.</p>
<p><strong>“Jesus Freaks”</strong></p>
<p>This program seems to have found its impetus in Don Lattin’s recently published book, “Jesus Freaks.” Although Lattin’s book does contain some sound research and factual information, it is laced with inaccuracies,  misconceptions and erroneous conclusions lacking a factual base—not to mention, sketchy research.  The stereotyping that Lattin resorts to manifests bias and religious intolerance, and an attempt to cast the Family’s deeply held Christian beliefs in a negative light. His writings echo the position of anti-religious proponents, who demonize the beliefs of others and set themselves as judges as to the legitimacy of a belief system and ultimately the right to one’s religious faith. His writings throughout 2005 on the Rodriguez incident reflected a similar ideology, and the preponderance of his writings have focused on ex-member allegations, while giving very little space to current member responses.  “Jesus Freaks” is no different.</p>
<p><strong>Incidence of Suicide amongst former members</strong></p>
<p>The claim that nearly 30 suicides occurred in the past 15 years has no basis in fact or official causes of death.  We acknowledge that those who were once a part of our movement are as likely to succumb to social illnesses as the population at large.  According to our records, however, the rate of incidence of suicide amongst the approximately 32,000 former members of the Family is far below the average in general, and in conformance to the expected rate in some age ranges.  </p>
<p>The World Health Organization estimates that suicide is responsible for a global mortality rate of 16 per 100,000 people per year. In the last 45 years suicide rates have increased by 60% worldwide, rendering it among the three leading causes of death among those aged 15-44.  In a period of history where the rates of suicide are rising at an alarming rate, suicide and acts of violence are virtually unknown in our fellowship.</p>
<p>Suicide and acts of violence are virtually unheard of in our communities. As Christians, we deplore and are diametrically opposed to acts of violence and the suffering these inflict on the innocent. We believe that human life is sacred, and each person should be respected as an individual created in the image of God. As Christians, our lives are devoted to sharing the news of God’s love and salvation for humanity and caring for the needy. (For more information on our charitable activities in over a hundred countries, please see <a href="http://www.thefamily.org/">www.thefamily.org</a>)<br />
<strong><br />
<a href="http://www.rickyrodriguez.org/">Ricky Rodriguez</a> and <a href="http://www.angela-smith.org/">Angela Smith</a></strong></p>
<p>The Family International was deeply saddened by the deaths of <a href="http://www.rickyrodriguez.org/">Ricky Rodriguez</a>, son of <a href="http://www.thefamily.org/en/about/structure-and-governance/">Karen Zerby</a>, and <a href="http://www.angela-smith.org/">Angela Smith</a>, a member of the Family for over 30 years. Ricky (1975-2005) committed suicide January 8th, 2005, after taking Angela’s life. (please see Ricky’s memorial site at <a href="http://www.rickyrodriguez.org/">www.rickyrodriguez.com</a> and Angela Smith’s memorial site at <a href="http://www.angela-smith.org/"> www.angela-smith.org</a>) </p>
<p>In response to the controversy this tragedy generated in the media, second generation members of the Family published a blog, in order to ensure that their voices may be heard.  Over 400 young people raised in the Family have posted statements and testimonials with photos. (please see <a href="http://www.myconclusion.com/">www.myconclusion.com</a> )</p>
<p><a href="http://www.rickyrodriguez.org/">Ricky Rodriguez</a> withdrew from the Family fellowship in 2000 in order to pursue his education and other interests. Although he departed on good terms, he later became estranged from his mother and sister. After contacting some of our more vitriolic apostates, he began to manifest violent tendencies.  Those who were aware of his violent intents failed to report it to authorities or seek assistance.</p>
<p>In searching for a motive for this tragic crime, the media should take care to not casually write off Angela’s death and justify the actions of an obviously disturbed young man acting out his misplaced anger.  Our society is rife with violence—regularly the public is exposed to violent crimes of individuals that act out the violence they witness via the media, and discuss anonymously via the internet.  Such crimes are not particular to religious groups—in fact such violence is shocking and entirely unheard of in Family communities.    </p>
<blockquote><p><a href="http://www.thefamily.org/">The Family International</a>, formerly known as the <a href="http://www.thefamily.org/en/about/our-history/">Children of God</a>, is a fellowship of Christian missionaries dedicated to preaching the Gospel around the world. Members have received Jesus Christ as their personal Savior and live and work together in small communities. Founded by <a href="http://www.thefamily.org/ourfounder/ourfounder.htm">David Brandt Berg</a> (1919–1994) in Southern California during the late ’60s, the Family has expanded into an international missionary fellowship located in over 100 countries around the world.  Approximately two-thirds of The Family’s full-time membership is comprised of second and third generation members. See <a href="http://www.thefamily.org/">www.thefamily.org</a> </p></blockquote>
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		<title>Review: An Uncommon Life, by Bethany Kelly</title>
		<link>http://www.myconclusion.com/review-an-uncommon-life-by-bethany-kelly</link>
		<comments>http://www.myconclusion.com/review-an-uncommon-life-by-bethany-kelly#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 26 Apr 2007 22:40:35 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dan</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[                    Speaking Out]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Archived]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.myconclusion.com/archives/2007/04/26/review-an-uncommon-life-by-bethany-kelly/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
An Uncommon Life is a collection of true-life accounts written by Bethany Kelly, the eldest daughter of Peter Amsterdam and Abi (formerly Damaris), recounting memories of her childhood and teenage years, including her interactions with Father David (Grandpa), Maria, and their immediate family.

* Read Bethany’s account of meeting Grandpa for the first time at five [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img src="http://www.anuncommonlife.com/img/layout/bethany-olivia-thumb.jpg" alt="Bethany Kelly with Olivia,  her daughter" style="float: right; margin-left: 15px;" width="200" height="160" /></p>
<p>An Uncommon Life is a collection of true-life accounts written by Bethany Kelly, the eldest daughter of Peter Amsterdam and Abi (formerly Damaris), recounting memories of her childhood and teenage years, including her interactions with Father David (Grandpa), Maria, and their immediate family.<br />
<span id="more-581"></span><br />
* Read Bethany’s account of meeting Grandpa for the first time at five years old.<br />
<em>I remember being mildly curious as to whether I would be meeting a man with a lion’s head.</em></p>
<p>* Hear about Grandpa’s attempts to teach her how to dive.<br />
<em>I’d walk to the edge of the diving board, put myself in the proper position, and promptly chicken out.</em></p>
<p>* Firsthand accounts of what it was like to be a part of the “Teen Training” program that took place in Grandpa’s Home.<br />
<em>I remember being somewhat disappointed that initially it was going to be just us girls, as at the time, I thought it would have been interesting to have four teen boys there as well.</em></p>
<p>* Read about hiking and camping adventures with her father, Peter A., and Pete (Ricky) and Techi.<br />
<em>The cold seemed to instantly hit my brain, and I sort of froze, watching things float out of the canoe as if in a daze.</em></p>
<p>* Read parts of personal letters Bethany and Pete wrote each other as they continued their close friendship while living apart.<br />
<em>Dear sweet Bethy, … I’ve learned a lot in this last year or so, from my trip, and from Grandpa’s Homegoing, and of course from you.</em></p>
<p>* And Bethany shares some of the joys and experiences she has encountered raising her daughter, Olivia.<br />
<em>I had cared for children for many years … so I figured I had a pretty good grasp of what was involved in having children. But having my own was so different. … I had no idea I was capable of so much love for a child.</em></p>
<p>Thirteen chapters of personal details!<br />
Over 60 never-before-published photos!<br />
Find it at: <a href ="http://www.anuncommonlife.com/">www.AnUncommonLife.com</a></p>
<p>Note: An Uncommon Life is an independent endeavor and not a WS publication. This was written with those 14-and-up as the target audience. However, there are portions that may be suitable to be read to children at the parent’s discretion.</p>
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		<title>To Whom This May Concern</title>
		<link>http://www.myconclusion.com/to-whom-this-may-concern</link>
		<comments>http://www.myconclusion.com/to-whom-this-may-concern#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 23 Mar 2007 15:45:04 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Dan</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[              Former Family members]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Archived]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Letters to the Editor]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.myconclusion.com/archives/2007/03/23/to-whom-this-may-concern/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[From Charles Borjas
  As a former member of The Family International, I am writing this in response to the Montel Williams Show which was recently aired on TV in the U.S.
  I joined The Family International when it was The Children of God in 1970. I was brought up as a Catholic and [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>From Charles Borjas<br />
  As a former member of The Family International, I am writing this in response to the Montel Williams Show which was recently aired on TV in the U.S.<br />
  I joined The Family International when it was The Children of God in 1970. I was brought up as a Catholic and already had a love of God and His Holy Word, and a desire to serve Him as a missionary someday, from the time I was 13 years old. <span id="more-580"></span><br />
  I saw The Children of God as a means that would enable me to fulfill my chosen vocation to serve God in another country. What I wanted was training in the Word and missionary life, and I got it without having to go through years and years of Bible school but by attending the classes and on the job training of witnessing to others the love of God, very similar to programs that many other youth groups such as Youth With A MISSION (YWAM) Teen Challenge and many other youth groups of many Christian Churches are doing today.<br />
  I spent 35 years with The Children of God/ Family of Love/ The Family/ and now called The Family International and left the group membership 2 years ago in retirement so I can pursue my spiritual life further, do some writing, studying and continue my missionary work independently.<br />
  5 of my children are still missionaries with the group today. None of my children have ever been abused in any way in the Family to my knowledge, a statement I would stake my life upon.<br />
  I really do sympathize with Davida, for the life she now has to lead, through her own choice, but I disagree with her that her chosen type of employment was all she had to fall back on, and that her childhood and up-bringing caused her or forced her to have to do what she does for a living.<br />
  She expressed with her own words that she likes it and enjoys it, so how can someone say that they were driven to do something because of their abusive childhood, and then turn around and say they really enjoy doing it? Sounds like quite a contradiction if you ask me.<br />
  The other girl, Amy, I knew her in Japan and was one of the teen overseers when the teen program was in it’s early beginnings, before the talk about victor camps came out.<br />
  Since I had been a missionary in Japan, most of my work was done out on pioneer fields wining and training new members in the basics of the Bible in what you might call “babes training”. Since that was one of my specialties, I had been asked to come there to help teach the teens that were there in some Bible basics, which included classes from the Bible on basic Christian beliefs.<br />
   One of my strong points was always the Bible, and I to this day could not live without its life giving Words spoken by Jesus Christ Himself and other men who were inspired and moved by the Holy Ghost.<br />
  During the few months I was there, I never saw any of the teens being mistreated or abused or forced to do anything they didn’t want to do. All of the teens who were there had decided to come of their own free will, including Amy, who was 15 years old at the time. She, as well as the others, willingly and enthusiastically participated in all of the special activities and duties inside the school without complaint. Every effort and care was given to ensure that the teens there were well cared for, and personal attention was given to each one to counsel them and help them through any personal problems they might have been going through.<br />
   Also at this same school was Daniel Roselle, when he was about the age of 13 or 14. I remember him being a quiet, calm and very polite and respectful boy and pleasant to be around. Since I was only there about three months, and there were many teens there it was difficult to get to know each and everyone personally, but I did get to talk to just about all of them. There were those teens there that I also knew prior to meeting them there. Some of them I knew from birth and also knew their parents pretty well too.<br />
It amazed me a shocked me too how some young people can change when they get older.<br />
  For example Daniel, who was so polite and respectful before, has a lot of bitterness now regarding things he said happened to him when he was 7 years old. And Amy, who was one of the teen leaders there and had a high profile and pleasant personality, is now a traumatized young woman.<br />
  One thing is certainly clear to me is that Montel Williams was given inaccurate information that was many years out of date, and yet he spoke as if these things just happened yesterday, and their testimony gave the impression that David Berg was still alive and carrying on all that Davida and Amy said he did on a daily basis, and also that this is the normal routine all of the Family International homes follow.<br />
  When you have heard both sides of the story, you see that what you view and hear on TV is designed to be a sensational attraction to draw viewers to that particular show, each show competing for the number one spot.<br />
It can be the same in religion too. You have these so called faith healers get on TV and “slay” people in the “Spirit” and perform so called healings that cannot ever be verified, then turn around and sincerely ask for your dollars.<br />
  This type of showmanship is common and necessary in order to attract people to their crusades, and it is the same with TV show psychologists, who also have to be showmen and be able to attract people to watch their show in order to stay in the top ratings. That is what show business is all about; competition, not helping people.<br />
  That is why they make promises, and have such emotional reactions that give the appearance of sympathizing with their guests.<br />
In such an atmosphere of acting, “make believe” and gimmickry designed to draw out the emotions of the audience and public, it is impossible to see the situation, as it really is since it appears to be so one-sided.<br />
  That is why I feel it IS important to get both sides of the story in order to get the true picture and proper balance of what is happening, and put things in their proper perspective.<br />
	I know the tactics psychologists use in their treatment of so-called posttraumatic syndrome. It is through the power of suggestion and even in some cases using hypnosis to cause their patients to “remember” the so called details of their traumatic experience and get them to relive it in their minds. This, in my opinion, causes even more psychological damage to their mind and emotions and they end up in worse shape, needing years of therapy afterwards, possibly never coming out of the vortex they have created for themselves.<br />
  This process shows clearly that the so called victim’s real purpose is not to get help for their problem, but their real motive is, in bitterness, to hurt the so called perpetrators and instigators of what the trauma they claim to have experienced.<br />
  In their weakened mental state they would be very susceptible to become victims of even more abuse by outer forces using them to further their own agenda. When they are finished being used they are then sadly lopped aside and left to themselves to then deal with their own worsened state of mind.<br />
If such an inconceivable magnitude of trauma and abuse was truly suffered by someone, and they are sincerely making an effort to get the inner healing they require, I believe that the first and foremost step would be to do as Jesus    Christ commands us. “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us”<br />
  Of course psychologists and therapists would never agree that Jesus is the answer.<br />
  However, If that first step is not taken, inner healing cannot take place. This cannot only lead to emotional instability, but also physical diseases.<br />
  Only God and His love can give inner healing to the heart, and only The Word of God can renew the mind. So there needs to be not only forgiveness of the person, which does not mean condoning the deed done, but looking at it in the sense of the person who committed the hurting act as also being a victim of an outside or spiritual force, natural emotion, physical tendencies, or circumstances of which we all know can be a result of living in an un-renewed world, with an un-renewed mind.<br />
  Then it is easier to forgive the person without condoning the act. At least that gets us off the hook with God, and the inner healing can take place as our relationship with God is healing with this first step.<br />
Other wise one can go through the rest of his or her life still under the control of the trauma they have decided to entertain in their minds for years, in bitterness and unforgiveness. That alone sadly can and has destroyed many a life.<br />
  So, I firmly believe, contrary to what professional doctors and psychologists and therapists say, that the answer to inner healing, if one so desires, is to correct their relationship with God, and believe that He loves them unconditionally no matter what they are thinking they went through.<br />
  Then, there has to be a total renewing of the mind and thinking process which only can be done effectively and permanently by reading, studying and meditating on the Word of God, the Bible.<br />
  One can only be depressed and traumatized as long as he or she is making the choice to think about the things that depress them. It is common sense that if you keep thinking about what you have suffered, or bad things that have happened to you, those things will become your master and control your thoughts. It will be impossible to ever be happy as long as you are thinking unhappy thoughts.<br />
  The thing that drove Ricky to do what he did was not his upbringing. It was the way he chose to view his upbringing and other events he described vividly according to the thoughts he himself chose to entertain. These thoughts obsessed him day and night until he had no power over them. He accepted them, agreed with them, and then they had power over his life. To those who believe in the spirit world, we know these types of thoughts come from Satan and not God. IN God’s Word it says that Satan’s only purpose is to steal and to destroy. (John 10) So naturally, his goal is to get us to think thoughts of destruction, of others and self. That is the ultimate place where bitterness leads.<br />
  Jesus said “if ye abide in Me and My Words abide in you ye shall ask what ye will and it shall be done unto you” If we love His Words, we will read them, absorb them, meditate on them and they will bring to us life, not destruction! </p>
<p>  Then we can ask the Lord to deliver us from depressing thoughts, and He will do it, because He is the King! He is the King and we are the subjects and citizens of His kingdom! The Word of a king cannot be altered by anyone, not even the king. I know from experience that this process works better than any kind of therapy or psychology!</p>
<p>  King David in Psalm One wrote by the Holy Spirit: “Blessed is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor standeth in the way of sinners, nor sitteth in the seat of the scornful, but his delight is in the Law of the Lord, and in His Law doth he Meditate day and night!” The Law is God’s precious Word. If we meditate in it day and night we cannot think of the negative things that would cause us to want to hurt and harm others or ourselves. I can’t help but think how different things would have been if Ricky had believed that simple but profound truth, as well as others who suffered and are now suffering needlessly because they would rather live in bitterness and revenge than forgiveness and peace of mind and heart.<br />
  Whatever someone had suffered, you cannot blame your present state of mind and depression or bitterness on anyone but your own freewill that causes you to choose to think that way. Bitterness hate and revenge will not bring anyone happiness and joy and peace of mind, only unhappiness, depression, death and destruction, because of the thought pattern one chooses to follow. Proverbs says, “As a man thinketh in his heart so is he”<br />
As you think in your heart, that is what you will become like and there is no avoiding it.<br />
  So my best wishes go out to the young missionaries in The Family International who have chosen of their own free will to live the life of a missionary on the field of their choice. </p>
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